My rambling blog posts!

  This mug got broken today by myself due to my clumsiness and I was devastated, genuinely gutted at the time. You are probably wondering why a 42 year old man with a vast selection of mugs would be even remotely upset by a mug smashing, well, let me attempt to articulate it... I am sentimental, (to the degree you could say I put the mental into sentimental), if you have ever written me a note, card, letter or given me a gift of any size or shape, the chances are I still have it, lovingly stored away in either a cupboard, cabinet or in my scrapbook. I can easily get attached to things as they are like little memory time capsules to me. I am always touched when someone cares enough to show me they like me, either verbally or physically so why this mug in particular?  Whilst it's true I am a huge Muppets fan, Kermit especially, it's not that. It's in part about who gave me the gift as they are no longer around. The mug was bought for me from HMV by my older brother when I wen...

  Firstly, let's address the above photo; it's one of mine taken the other night when it was dark and misty and I needed a breather from the post-Christmas comedown. I felt it set the tone nicely as the weather matched my mood, it still does, I feel "misty and gloomy", SAD has arrived earlier than usual this year, it always turns up in January but to happen before new years eve is unheralded!  It's worth mentioning that I was going to say all of this here blog in a podcast form, (a good friend of mine even donated a podcast mic for just such an occasion), sadly I couldn't do it, I tried to record it and ended up getting emotional and looked ridiculous, (my rubbery, ogre-like face looks insane when I get upset, I wouldn't inflict that on anyone), so this here blog will have to suffice. Plus to be fair, this will be rather long-winded and potentially depressing due to the subject matter and how hard I've crashed, so wouldn't be a successful start to ...

  Confidence is a strange thing isn't it? We're taught from a young age to always be confident, stand upright and face the world head on. To be confident in your own abilities, self confidence is key...but to some of us that never really worked out. I don't recall ever having high self confidence, I remember many incidences where I knew the answer to something that someone was asking but opted not to say anything just in case I was wrong. I have zero confidence in regards to how I am as a person, what I look like and any skills I may have. Even this here blog has had about 12 re-writes so far and will no doubt will ramble on too long by the time I post it. Luckily I just assume not very many people will read it all - mainly thanks to that lack of self-belief.  However, what if this isn't a bad thing? Nobody likes someone who is over-confident, cocky and smug. That's nauseating to say the least, it usually goes hand-in-hand with narcissism. Is there a balance between...

This blog post you are currently reading has taken me ages to type out; not because I'm really bad at typing or spelling, but the editing and deleting of certain sections to make this remotely interesting and not depressing has proven to be quite the struggle. Added into the mix we also have the fact this has now been written and edited over a number of days and therefore, due to my fluctuating mood, the tone has shifted dramatically throughout. Am I happy with this, the end product? It seems ok now but if I were to read it tomorrow? Maybe not. Let me explain... This year has been brutal. I realise most people have had worse years than I - and I am in no way saying my sadness is more important or devastating as others; we all have sad happenings and tragedies in our lives and it's silly to compare them. If you are hurting for whatever reason - you have my greatest sympathies, it's a hard world out there and it seems at times to be unfair. As stated above, (before my incessa...

  Some of you may know that for many, many years now I have traditionally made a LOT of handmade Christmas cards for my friends and co-workers. I usually start the process in September, (as I make around 120-130 individual cards with about 60 different designs), as it takes a lot of time and effort, (even if they don't look like it at times).  I realise this may all sound narcissistic, it isn't, at no point have I ever thought anybody is particularly bothered about my Christmas card arriving or not, but I do hope those of you who have received a card have enjoyed them as much as I've enjoyed making them at least. I've had some kind comments over the years and that'salways nice to hear, but I'm definitely not big-headed about them...however, with that in mind, this years events have taken a toll on my mind clearly as I have hit a complete writers block, the ideas well has run dry for the first time in my life! I haven't been able to make a start and it's ...

  Tonight we sadly had to say goodbye to our canine companion Woodie and to say we are heartbroken is an understatement.  I'm having a rough time of it at the moment as recently my dear brother passed away too and one night as I sat on the floor crying, Woodie walked over to me and licked my face and therefore my tears away, stood near me and genuinely comforted me. Well, tonight my tears are for him too and I wish he were here to comfort us.  I know everyone who has a dog thinks their dog is the best but Woodie actually was! I've never seen a dog with such a gentle, sweet soul as Woodie. When we decided to get a dog all those years ago we went to a greyhound rescue centre and they let us meet another greyhound first called Sunny, who was a lovely well-behaved dog but not quite the right fit. I couldn't remember the name of the dog my wife wanted to see, (as unlike me, she had looked at them online), but I knew it was a dog with a name off of Toy Story. I asked to meet Wo...